OK IAM READY TO LET IT ALL OUT !!

LOL OK REALLY TAKIN IT BACK FROM THE BEGINNIG : LOL WHEN I FRIST SAW U THE FIRST THING I SAID TO MYSELF WAS " GORGEOUS " LOL IT WAS SOMETHING ABOUT YO EYES N THAT SMILE ... I REALLY WASNT LOOKIN AT U LIKE THAT , I MEAN I ASK A FRIEND ABOUT U N WAT WAS YOUR NAME, SO THE NEXT TIME I SEE U I COULD SAY HELLO N NOT JUST CALL U BOY : LOL : THIS FRIEND ALSO TOLD ME U WERE GOIN TO THE ARMY , IT REALLY DIDNT EFFECT ME AT FRIST ,WE BEGAN TO TALK .... A FEW KISSES INVOLVE N NUMBERS EXCHANGE ... I DIDNT WANT TO RUSH THINGS , I HAD MY GUARD UP ..... I WANTED TO WAIT U SAID OK .....THEN U COULDNT WAIT NO MORE SO I SAID YES ! INSIDE MY MIND I ALL I COULD THINK WAS "OMG IAM REALLY GOIN WIT HIM ,IS THIS RIGHT ,CAN I TRUST HIM ,DID I REALLY JUST SAY YES !. IT STARTED OUT GOOD .EVEN THO MY GUARD WAS UP I STILL WANTED TO GIVE U A CHANCE .SO MANY THINGS WERE GOIN ON IN MY MIND , THEN IT HIT ME AGAIN THAT U WERE GOIN TO THE ARMY ! I TRYED NOT TO THINK ABOUT HAS MUCH AND ENJOY THE TIME I SPENT WIT U LOL ! BUT IN MY MIND I REALLY WASNT HAPPY LIKE I WANTED TO B , ALL I COULD REALLY THINK ABOUT WAS THE ARMY AND U NOT COMIN BACK N NOT FEELIN THE SAME WAY , I WANTED U CLOSE BUT THEN WANTED TO PUSH U AWAY , I DIDNT WANT TO GET HURT AGAIN OR FEEL THE SAME PAIN ALL OVER AGAIN. I STARTED TO GIVE IN MORE AND TRUST U WASNT GONE HURT ME N THAT EVERYTHING WOULD BE OK .....U TOLD ME U LOVE ME N THAT I WAS YO RIB ,N U WAS GONE MAKE ME MS.COOK THAT MADE ME REALLY HAPPY ,YEA WE ALOT OF UPS N DOWNS N WE HAVNT BEEN TOGETHER THAT LONG ,BUT WE WORK THREW THEM , I TOLD U I WAS GONE B THERE NO MATTER WAT !! N THAT I WOULD ALWAYS LOVE U BUT THEN THE WORST DAY CAME ...... THAT DAY STARTED OFF GOOD ENDED UMMMMM NOT SO GOOD .... THAT DAY WAS THE WORST DAY EVER .... THE BREAK UP U CALL IT OFF , I FELT LIKE MY HEART WAS BEIN STAB N SHOT AT , I COULD BREATHE ,UNLIMITED TEARS , I WANTED IT TO B A DREAM N NOT REAL , LONG NITES THINKIN Y , PAIN IN MY HEART , I REALLY WANTED TO HATE U ,N WANTED TO DELETE AND PRETEND U DIDNT HAPPEN BUT I COULDNT .... I TRYED SO HARD ...BUT NONETHING WOULD BRING ME TO HATE U . I FELT LIKE U PLAYED ME IN EVERY WAY , U SAID U WANTED TO TALK THATS WHEN I KNEW IT WAS REAL , IT WAS SO HARD TO LOOK AT U , LOOKIN AT THOSE EYES JUST KILLED ME EVEN MORE INSIDE ...PEOPLE TOLD ME TO LET GO , STOP THINKIN ABOUT , IT WOULD BE OK BUT REALLY I KNEW IT WOULDNT ....U WANTED TO STILL B CLOSE FRIENDS AND I SAID OK ,BUT BEGIN FRIENDS WAS GOIN TO BE HARD, BUT I STARTED TO WRAP MY HEART AROUND IT , EVEN THO IT WAS GOIN TO BE HARD AND TAKE ALONG TIME TO GET OVER U , WE HAD A TALK ABOUT THE FEELIGS WE WERE STILLL HAVIN AND HOW STRONG THEY WERE ........... STILL THINKIN ABOUT SOME OF THE THINGS WE TALKED ABOUT LAST NITE , AND IF YOUR SURE ABOUT YOUR DECISION CUZ I CANT DO AGAIN ...IS THIS REALLY WAT U WANT N R U SURE ....................